# Planning a wedding...families are too big!



## FRIENDLYFISHIES (Aug 7, 2012)

do you think 47 people are too many for a small wedding? Im feeling a bit overwhelmed. The # reflects siblings and their kids, grandparents and parents with a handful of aunts and uncle, no friends. I wanted like 15 people! I think im stuck with the 47 though :/...Im just going to run away! *Run away bride*


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## emc7 (Jul 23, 2005)

My sister is in the same boat. Its just us two kids and her fiancee has one sister. But both our parents are one of 6, likewise her groom's parents have a big family. So add in aunts, uncles, cousins and it gets enormous fast. No way its going to be small. Just how big. Add in school friends, work friends, and where does it stop? Complicating things is the fact the many are our of state and can't commit to coming until she gives them a date. But a date first requires a venue that wants to know "How many?"

My advice. 

Keep it simple as simple as you can, but invite your close friends, too. There isn't a whole lot of difference between 50 & 100 (Unless your venue only allows 50 in). Who do you really want there? Having someone of your own to hold your hand will keep you from bolting. Hold it on a weekday or in an out of the way place so extra people can't easily just show up. 

Have the ceremony open to anyone who wants to show up, but have the reception invitation only. plus 1 means 1, not 3. No kids invited. Have an Aunt or mom be enforcer.

Delegate. Everyone knows someone who is really into weddings. Find them and let them "help". The girl who reads wedding mags can be your guide to this strange industry that has sprung up to suck every last dime from committing couples and their parents.

You have to invite family. No exceptions except young age limits. Any second cousin you miss could start a feud and her grandkids will hate yours. Even banning kids will be problematic. You might have to supply childcare.

Repeat to yourself. "This won't matter in 20 years". Keep things in perspective. Laugh at silly dresses and centerpieces. Get music you love. Put in on a portable device and use it to calm you and get you in the "wedding" mode. Cut out anything that isn't contributing to your happiness. You can do without whichever dumb detail is stressing you out.

I think the point of the long gown and heels is to make it hard for the bride to get away. http://www.ebay.com/itm/Humorous-Ca...200?pt=LH_DefaultDomain_0&hash=item51a44ca450


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## weedkiller (Nov 18, 2012)

just think of the pressies lol..
an we didn't get an invite either.. no pressies from us


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## FRIENDLYFISHIES (Aug 7, 2012)

lol funny story...today when I was more awake I made the list over again and realized I left out some family lol...we jumped from what I thought was 47 to 90!!!! 90 people! Its going to be insanity. Ive been doing some price checking, I was worried it would be too expensive, my budget was $1000...but all said and done it seems to be about $2000-$3000, if we split, it will be $1000-1500 each which might be managable and mum said as a wedding gift she'd like to buy my dress and shoes, which ive found a dress for $120! cant beat that. Im not an expensive person lol, $1000 of the cost will be catering and then $300 will be a tent. We are making the seating and tables out of an tall pine hes planning to cut down in the woods behind the house and we are going to stain it and cover it with discount fabric. As far as floral goes, if everything works out for seasonal timing I might be able to snatch all of mum hydrandeas! Im not going to get too fancy in decor, mostly going to count on the flowers and maybe a few candles here and there. We wont have a dj, just use some CD's and a good sound system and people can dance in yard lol. No alchohol so we wont have to worry about that cost. The bf is hoping to have his good friend make the cake and our photos might cost $300. I think it will work out and im not as stressed now that I have an approximate cost...phew. I was thinking with 90 ppl it would be like $5000! I was never going to be okay with that lol. Good thing I did some price checking.


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## BV77 (Jan 22, 2005)

My wedding was too big, also. My wife showed up......lol


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